Psychosomatic Pain Isn’t Fake: What It Really Means for Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain

Why “psychosomatic” should be validating—not dismissive

The Word That Gets Thrown Around

Few words sting more when you live with fibromyalgia, ME/CFS, or chronic pain than psychosomatic.

And it usually shows up the same way:

From a doctor: “Your labs are fine—maybe it’s psychosomatic.”

From a well-meaning friend: “Have you tried therapy?”

From some rando on the internet: “Chronic pain is often psychosomatic, you know.”

And just like that, your very real symptoms feel dismissed.

Like your pain is make-believe.

Like if you just thought differently, you’d be fine.

Let’s set the record straight:

✨ Your pain is real. Your symptoms are real. You are not imagining it.

But here’s the part most people miss: the psychosomatic connection is real too—just not in the way you’ve been told.

What “Psychosomatic” Really Means

Time to bust a few myths:

🚫 Psychosomatic doesn’t mean “all in your head.”

🚫 It doesn’t mean you’re faking it.

🚫 And it definitely doesn’t mean you can “think your way out of it.”

Here’s what it does mean:

🧠 Psycho = mind

🩺 Somatic = body

Psychosomatic describes the mind-body connection—how your nervous system processes stress, sensation, and pain.

This isn’t woo. This is biology.

Think about it:

• Ever had your stomach flip before a job interview?

• Felt a headache clamp down after a brutal workday?

• Gone bright red when your crush walks in right as you trip over your own feet?

  
  

That’s psychosomatic in action.

Now imagine a nervous system that’s been stuck in chronic stress, trauma, illness, or overload. That brain-body loop gets stuck—sending pain signals even when there’s no obvious cause.

That doesn’t make your pain less real.

It means your body is working overtime to protect you—and the alarm forgot how to shut off.

“Psychosomatic doesn’t mean fake. It means your brain and body are talking.”

Why Pain Sometimes Doesn’t Switch Off

Here’s how pain is meant to work:

✅ Injury happens →✅ Brain registers pain →✅ Injury heals →✅ Pain stops

But with chronic pain, the loop glitches:

🚨 No injury →🚨 Brain still registers pain →🚨 Nothing to “fix” →🚨 Pain persists

It’s like a smoke alarm that won’t shut off—even after the fire is out.

Not because your body is broken. Not because you’re imagining it.

Because your nervous system has learned pain as protection. It’s doing its job too well—and doesn’t know the danger has passed.

“The body keeps the score.” – Bessel van der Kolk

The Trauma–Pain Connection in Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue

Here’s the part most doctors don’t explain:

Trauma doesn’t have to be dramatic to be damaging.

It’s not just what happened—it’s how your nervous system processed it.

And if you’ve lived with chronic pain, chances are:

• You pushed through symptoms for years because you had no choice

• You were dismissed, gaslit, or misdiagnosed by medical professionals

• You lived in survival mode so long your body forgot how to switch off

  
  

This creates a system that treats everything as a threat—even touch, movement, or emotions.

That’s not weakness.

That’s your body trying to protect you.

But protection at that level? It hurts.

And healing means teaching your body what safety feels like again.

So Where Does That Leave You?

Here’s the truth most people don’t hear:

Because your nervous system can learn pain, it can also relearn safety.

This isn’t about “positive thinking.”

It’s about giving your body repeated, lived experiences of calm until the alarm dials down.

Ways to help your system remember safety:

🌬 Nervous system regulation → slow exhales, vagus nerve practices, grounding

🧘 Gentle movement → yoga, stretching, micromovements that prove movement isn’t always danger

💆 Tension release → safe touch, myofascial work, even shaking (like animals do post-stress)

📝 Emotional processing → journaling, expressive writing, or trauma-informed therapy

This isn’t about fixing your thoughts.

It’s about rebuilding trust between your brain and your body.

Of Course—Rule Out Other Causes

Let’s be clear: chronic pain can absolutely come from structural issues, infection, or other biological causes. That’s why medical care matters.

Nothing here replaces working with your doctor.

This is about addressing one overlooked layer—the nervous system’s role in amplifying pain—especially when the scans keep coming back “normal” and you’re left feeling dismissed.

Final Thought: Psychosomatic Doesn’t Mean Make-Believe

Understanding psychosomatic pain doesn’t invalidate you. It validates you.

It says:

🧠 Your brain is plastic—it can change.

🔁 Your nervous system is trainable—it can regulate.

🌱 Your body isn’t broken—it’s protecting you, even if the method sucks.

This isn’t about blame.

It’s about power.

The more you understand the psychosomatic connection, the more tools you gain to turn the volume down on pain—and get your life back.

Want More Tools for Your Fibro Toolbox?

My relief didn’t come from one magic cure—it came from layering tools that actually work.

If you’d like more science-meets-soul strategies for fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, and chronic pain relief, join my [newsletter].

It’s where I share the layered tools I still use today—the ones that helped me interrupt flare-ups, reclaim energy, and finally feel at home in my body again.